Amazon Misplaces My Merman Porn

Usually when I buy "Ladies' Erotica," I buy it as an e-pub download since I am unlikely to re-read it, and it takes up very little space in that form. But I found the last two e-books I read annoying, because they were pretty good as far as plot, decent research, and characters go (I read m/m historic rubbish, and to say it's a niche market is an understatement, so finding good ones is fabulous)and the formatting was off in both of my e-pub downloads, so the last page of each chapter was loaded in twice-- which messed up the flow of reading.

So when I saw a little blurb for a historic m/m romance with a merman I was pretty happy, and even happier to find I could get it in actual book form from Amazon. Of course I am not paying for shipping for just one book, so I tossed in some other stuff I had on my wishlist; a Kinuko Craft calendar for next year, a Patrick O'Brian novel I had been checking out of the library, and a fantasy trilogy by a new author I wanted to try.(K said that this list was "something an actual mermaid would order.")

So I got a shipping notice, and it said it would come Aug 4th, and that was fine. Aug 4 comes and no box of books. I look at the tracking and it says it was delivered at 7:18 Aug 2nd, which was a Sunday morning. Now I might have thought, well, it got left on the step and someone wandered off with it--though its a LONG wander from the street, BUT IN FACT I was actually up, dressed and weeding Sunday morning because I was waiting for Target to open up so I could get breakfast stuff, and a coffee. And there was no truck.

So after some floundering around on the website looking for the "where is my stuff" button, I finally found the right dialog box, plugged in my order number and said, "well, where is my stuff?" I got an email back fairly quickly offering to replace one item, but the Merman Porn seemed to be a more difficult thing to replace. I wrote back and said I was pretty sure the box was still in the warehouse in Lisle, because anyone who opened it wasn't going to find a Kindle Fire in there, despite the larger box to accommodate the calendar, and they would probably just push it back in the bin, and I did kind of want my porn.

So Amazon wrote back and said they had looked harder, and they were terribly sorry, but while the original order seemed to have been "lost in transit" and the delivery data faked, they were going to replace everything AND get it to me by 8 PM tonight. Which was pretty neat-- but at the same time I looked at the tracking and Amazon had to assemble the Avengers to get things from a warehouse in San Bernardino, Calif and also some site in Indiana AND get some courier to take it to the USPS and rocket my stuff at great trouble and expense to my house, all because some fool in Lisle decided to jack my merman book. Amazon was a little concerned that I would feel this incident would make me less likely to buy from them and I told them no worries, because while they were jetting around refilling my lost order, I had ordered a new 18th century costume construction book from them. I like Amazon a lot, though I admit I buy things a lot from Barnes and Noble because you can actually flip through the books there, and I like the cafe. Amazon has not yet figured out the one hour cannoli delivery... yet.